Happy Graduation Joseph!

Today was a big milestone in Joseph's life. He graduated from 6th grade. He was asked to be one of the speakers. Here he is looking nervous before his speech. He did a great job and a link to the video of the speech can be found on my facebook page. This bottom picture is him getting his diploma.


Christopher & Joseph


Joseph & Dennis

Joseph & Nanny

Joseph & Emily

Joseph, Christine & Stephanie

Joseph with his diploma

Joseph with some of his friends. The cute girl in the middle is who he would be betrothed to if that was still allowed.

Two of his bestest friends!

Joseph wanted his graduation celebration to be at Wingers.

After we ate, we came home for some cake and more celebrating. It was such a great day. It was hard to contain the emotion during the ceremony. He is my little baby boy and it is so hard to watch him get so big so fast. I'm so proud of him and even prouder to be his mom! Congratulations Joseph! We love you!

Update? Not So Much!

So yesterday was the stress test of Chris' heart. He had worn a holter monitor last week and had an echo done last week too. Guess what? All of those darn tests look great. Good news and frustrating news. He still does have an inverted T line, but that may or may not have caused his loss of consciousness. They categorized it as a "non-specific abnormality" WHAT? So he may just have this electrical glitch that may or may not cause him problems, but for now he can resume all normal activities without restrictions. He will next week get another monitor he will wear for two weeks just as a final precaution. Wow! No answers. I should have figured. Back to square one. We will probably never know what caused him to lose consciousness or why he gets light headed or why he has tremors in his hands and arms. I know in my heart there is something, but I don't know how to push anymore. He's had all the tests I can think of. I guess it will be a hoping and waiting game. He is excited to drive, but the mono keeps him pretty home bound. We are all sick. Do we all have mono? Maybe. It is very possible at this point. I'm just barely getting through the day and have to keep checking kids out of school and bringing cough drops and doing breathing treatments and getting more ibuprofen. Good thing Gatorade is on sale at Macey's for 50 cents. I bought 20. Trying to keep the liquids in all of us. I wake up so miserable every morning, but can handle some things by afternoon only to feel miserable again before bed. Sleep is not restful. I hear kids getting up for drinks because they are all miserable too. Even Dennis is sick. Joseph Graduates tomorrow so we better muster up strength for that. It is sick little world we live in.

Squiggle

Our sweet neighbor Jacque made this awesome friend for Emily. His name is "Squiggle". She LOVES him. I saw Jacque making these and commented on how much my daughter would love a cute little guy like that. About a week later she showed up on our doorstep with one for Emily in her favorite color I might add. She was thrilled! She takes him everywhere and they have already had many adventures. Thank you Jacque! You are wonderful and made my daughter so happy!

Emily's Chorus Performance

Last night was Emily's chorus performance. She did a great job!

Her brothers were very sweet and supportive.

Andraia and Chloe and their mom, Teri were so kind to come support Emily. We just love their family!

Now anyone who knows how much Emily "likes" Dennis should know what a special picture this is. She is smiling next to him. I just love this picture!

She looked so pretty tonight. She had her hair specially done by Kristie and she had to wear her red lipstick and she found this sparkly piece of material to drape over her shirt. She felt pretty and that is what matters most and what made my heart smile for her. Good job Emily! We love you!

Crazy Hair Day

It's that special day of the school year that my kids just love. Joseph always just goes for straight color. Emily wants to be as wacky as possible. We used some cups to give her some volume. She was quite pleased with her look this year. She would do crazy hair day everyday if she could!

Happy Birthday Kristie

Last week was Kristie's birthday. I let Chris out of the house for a couple hours so we could take her out to dinner. We went to Pirate Island for the first time.
Joseph and Chris had an intense game of air hockey.

Joseph brought a few friends and all the kids seemed to have fun. All the boys were very kind and gave Emily all their tickets. She had 800 and traded them for about 800 pices of junk. She enjoyed every minute of it.

Emily helped me make her a cake and we sang and celebrated when we got home. Happy birthday Kristie. We love you!

World's Fair

Today was the world's fair at school. It is like a country report with a lot more flair. Chris' illness caused a lot of delay on these projects and we spent all night getting this ready. We had a team of helpers. I got him some Mardi Gras decorations to wear. He though he looked pretty good.


Chris' friend, Lexin helped make this Eiffel Tower out of popsicle sticks. Then Joseph spray painted it. There is a picture of Joseph's great, great grandmother in front of the Eiffel Tower. Joseph also made crepes the other night which is documented on the poster along with 10 famous people. I think he did a great job and it turned out great!

All the classes get to come see everyone's displays. I caught Emily at Joseph's booth asking for the feather mask when his project is over.

More Tests and a lot of PATIENCE

The neurologists appointment was yesterday. She informed us that Christopher's EEG was normal. His MRI also showed that his contusion is almost all the way healed. She does not believe he had a seizure or that he has any signs of any neurological defects. Good news on that end. He is still post concussed which means he still has to strengthen his memory skills and slight headaches, but other than that his head is getting much better. The cardiologist was today. They said he may have had a heart attack, but they don't know. He does have an inverted line of some sort. I didn't get the details perfect because they don't know the answers yet. We have two more weeks of testing. There is something definitely abnormal though and it could be serious or not very. They want to rule out an enlarged heart as well. He has to wear a monitor next week for five days and the next week have an echo cardiogram and a treadmill stress test. The 27th is when I get the results of all of those tests. I'm not going to stress because I don't have the answers and if something is serious I can stress out when I know. He does have mono and that will keep him resting until we do know what exactly is wrong with his heart. His sickness probably made his heart work harder and that may have caused his loss of consciousness. I am not a patient person and I hope I can make it through the next two weeks without going crazier than I already am. Thanks again for all the sweet phone calls and messages. I especially appreciate the dinner tonight. I have three school projects of Joseph's due tomorrow that have been postponed due to Chris' illness. It was so nice to work through dinner and have a dinner my kids would eat delivered by a beautiful friend. I am so blessed by the angels in my life.

Heart?

Okay, so yesterday Chris had an MRI of his brain and an EEG. The results should be back tomorrow. We went to his new internist who did an EKG today. He said that the EKG was abnormal and he needs to see a cardiologist immediately. So, he goes in on Thursday. On top of that he may have mono. Great right? Oh my! We should know some of the results tomorrow and also the neurologist apt is tomorrow. Wish us luck. I quit my Census job today. I can't even concentrate on anything else. Chris' dad is here from California going to all the apts. with me. I think Chris likes having his dad here. Emily has been having serious melt downs everyday, we have a country report plethora of projects due Friday and listen to this......Joseph AND Emily have sore throats. Yeah for us. I am so in a daze. I will update again tomorrow. Thanks for all of your prayers and love. We have been pampered with baked goods, dinners, cards, visits and I got a special mother's day treat in the mail from my "Great" friend that made my day. My friend Teri even took my kids in the middle of the night so we could rush off to the ER. Thanks to all who bring some sunshine into my rather dreary days lately. Love you all!!!

Back in the ER

Last night Christopher had to go back to the emergency room. His head felt like it was going to explode. He was crying and shaking and I had never seen him in that much pain. It was the most crowded ER I had ever seen. We had to wait for hours while he cried in pain. When we finally saw the doctor he said that Chris was leaking spinal fluid. Your brain floats and since Chris did not have enough fluid, his brain was just sitting on and sagging down all the nerves that are under the brain causing excruciating pain. It was caused by the spinal tap he had at the ER the other night. To fix it, they drew blood out of his IV and injected it into his spine causing a clot to put pressure on the hole the fluid was leaking from. It has worked very well. His pain subsided. Unfortunately that causes severe back pains. His throat and back hurt now. We didn't get home until after 5 a.m. It was one tired mother's day. Now I need to try and get some sleep because I have to wake up at 4 a.m. and keep Chris awake until his EEG in the morning. I feel like a zombie. I pray that they can tell me what is happening to my son. He needs the right help and I need some rest. What a long scary weekend!

911

I don't know why a lot of things have happened in my life. The only thing I do know is that my children are my everything. I have had to feel the sting of thinking they were all going to die and my Sarah did. Joseph was my first almost death. The doctors told us that he would surely die. I was in the hospital with him at 20 weeks gestation and he was already in the birth canal. That little boy held on for six more weeks while I lay motionless and helpless just waiting for his death. Even after he was born at 2 pounds they gave him grim odds of survival or quality of life. He is truly a gift, a miracle, a joy straight from Heavenly Father. The next happened during my pregnancy with Emily. I started bleeding. So much that it was running down my legs and filling my socks with blood. When I got to the ER they said I had lost the baby. They sent me into ultrasound for the final verification and there she was.....doing flips. I mean literally she was flipping all around like a crazy person. They have no medical explanation for what happened. Which is exactly the phrase one of my doctors said with Joseph. He said, "I don't know what you believe, but there is no medical explanation for why you are still pregnant." Emily was born and things were just fine until she was 2. She had the strangest behavior and no doctor took me seriously. It was just a few days after she turned three that I took her to the emergency room and told them that I would not leave until they told me what was wrong with my daughter. They treated me like the crazy mom and ran a few tests. A now humble doctor came in and told us of the huge mass on my daughters brain. death was imminent. Surgery needed to be done within a few hours. They didn't know if she would even live through the surgery. I had to kiss that little girl like it was the last time I would see her alive. She made it through and does have some damage to her brain which we have to deal with daily and believe me it is a challenge especially for her. Then next was Sarah. She did die and that has been the most heart wrenching experience of my life. I am still hurting and the pain is still very fresh at times. Last night, I thought Christopher might be dead. I heard a big thug upstairs and I told Dennis to check and see if Chris had fallen. He thought I was being strange to think that, but went upstairs to find Chris laying facing down on the ground. I ran upstairs and tried to arouse him with no response. I rolled him over because I seriously couldn't tell if he was breathing. I thought he could be dead. I screamed his name and kept trying to get some response while Dennis called 911 and Joseph looked on. Emily was asleep through everything, thank goodness. I finally saw his chest rise and fall and could feel his heart beating rapidly, but still no response. When the ambulance arrived he was still unresponsive. It took them a while, but he started to wake a little, but was incoherent. I rode in the ambulance with Chris. It was all I could do not to break down and start crying. I was scared. Joseph was at home crying and I wanted to comfort him so badly, but couldn't be in two places at the same time. He was so scared for his brother. It took a few hours before Christopher gained full cognition. He had many friends right there by his side in the ER. They ruled out many things and came to the conclusion it was a probable seizure. He will have an EEG on his brain Monday. He received a blessing and there was much talk after from our Bishop and counselor about Chris getting better for his mission. Chris was out of it, but said, "I'm going on a mission. I promised Him." I asked him several times who "Him" was and finally he said in a quiet voice, "Heavenly Father". I don't know if that means he has been praying a lot and talking to his Heavenly Father or if he spoke with him for a brief moment last night. Either way it's good to know my 18 year old speaks to his Father in Heaven. I will ask him later when he wakes up. He is still asleep. We didn't get home until about 4ish and I am tired, but can't sleep. I just got Joseph off to school. I let him sleep late. It was a scary night. I hope we can get some answers soon. For now he can't drive or do much of anything alone. I am grateful he was safe at home last night when this happened. Having also had a spouse die, I have looked into the face of death many times over the past decade. I keep thinking about what I'm supposed to be learning. I'm still not quite sure. I have learned that life is precious and fragile and should be cherished and never taken for granted. I have also learned that my life will never be what I had hoped for, but I need to make sure what I do have I learn to appreciate better because just when you think the best parts have been taken away, a reminder comes to show you that you have more to lose and those are the precious gifts that need our focus. Heavenly Father knows what he is doing. I don't. I just hope I can do the things necessary to receive the promptings when they come. I didn't mean for a long depressing post, but I was just feeling overwhelmed by my experiences and needed to let them out.

That's My Boy

Dear Joseph,
Congratulations on being chosen to speak at 6th grade graduation. You are a role model for the rest of the 6th grade and should be proud of the work you have done this year. Your assigned topic is "What We Can Take With Us From Windsor", and should last approximately 5 minutes. If you need help, please talk with your teacher. Graduation will be held on the 27th at 1:00. You will sit in the front facing the audience. Again, thank you for the good person you are. We look forward to hearing from you at graduation.
Sincerely,
6th Grade Teachers

This is the note Joseph brought home from school today. I couldn't be more proud of him. He is a wonderful boy and I love him so much. He is my miracle baby and his life brings me the joy of a lifetime. Congratulations Joseph.........You Rock!